Did you grow up outside of the Netherlands, and do/did you have Dutch parents? Then chances are high that you heard a lot of Dutch. You may remember that your parents or other family members were using certain words or expressions, and when you hear Dutch, it sounds familiar to you. Maybe, if you are ‘lucky’ enough, you also picked it up so that now, speaking Dutch is the most natural thing in the world. And who knows? You may already master one specific Dutch skill: cursing and using bad words.
However, many Dutch families, certainly when they moved to English-speaking countries some time ago, did not prioritise teaching Dutch to their children. Most Dutch parents tended to believe that only English really mattered because, of course, it was the language they needed most to survive and succeed in a whole new country.
It is that Intriguing Mystery
A language is so much more than just a bunch of words in a certain sentence structure. Often, it is that one thing that tells so much about your family’s history. Although you can communicate in English with your parents, you also realize that they come from a totally different world. If you are curious to learn more about their background, personality, and character, speaking Dutch will help you a lot.
Albert Both, also known as Meneer Dutch Brainwash, runs a 7-day course in the historical centre of Amsterdam, the Netherlands, and has already worked with several students from the USA or Canada to help them connect on a deeper level with some Dutch members of their family.
I always see it as a great honor, says Albert, when people take a plane and come to Amsterdam for my seven-day course. I love it when people can strengthen their relationships with those who play an important part in their lives.
The good thing is that when you hear Dutch as a child, the language already sounds familiar to you, and there are many things that you picked up, consciously or unconsciously. You know how it sounds, and you can probably make some sentences, yet a big part of Dutch also remains a mystery.
Learning Dutch as a Child is Not Enough to Speak on an Adult Level
Yes, as a child, there are many things you can pick up, and yet when you are older, you probably realise there are many more things to discover in Dutch. You probably also picked up many things intuitively, but somehow you do not know how the language works. Also, as an adult, you are no longer a child, and you like to talk about different things and express other feelings, but you probably do not know how. If you try to get tips and advice from your family members, most of the time, it will be useless. Most native speakers cannot explain how their language works.
A significant competitive advantage you may have in this situation is that you’ll likely feel a strong drive and great curiosity. As you get older, you also feel the natural desire to know your parents and your cultural background much better. You may have heard many Dutch words and expressions, and now suddenly you wonder: why did my mother or father say these things? What does it tell us about their character?
The Brainwash
When people with Dutch family connections join my 7-day Brainwash Course, says Albert, always great things start to happen. What I love to see is that people are beginning to feel closer to their Dutch relatives in the Netherlands, as well as to those who still live there. Yes, you can speak English with your Dutch family members, but once you speak Dutch, a whole new world opens up. You start to see new parts of their personality that you may never have noticed before.
Albert also has a cousin in Australia. His father (my uncle) was a lazy b*st*rd and never taught him any Dutch. Like many others, he used to believe that English was the only language that really mattered, and when he visits Holland now and then, we talk about our family, but in English. It may be hard to explain, even though I speak fluent English. I find it weird to talk about mijn moeder, mijn vader, or mijn opa en oma in English. Somehow, it makes less sense. On an emotional level, it makes a huge difference and mijn neef (cousin) often feels a bigger distance.
Sure, if you visit your Dutch family in Holland, they can speak English with you. But, in a way, it is quite a lame experience. Once you start speaking Dutch—even if it is far from perfect—you realize you are much more engaged and start to know your family members so much better.
So, what do you need to do if you would like to be more in touch with the Dutch part of your family? You may try a Dutch course, but then you’ll soon discover that they mainly cover things that you would use as a tourist. But once you have that Dutch background from your family, you don’t like to talk like a tourist anymore. Probably, you like to talk about things that really matter.
I still remember Ed saying Albert was from Canada. Within days, he was shocked that I could suddenly read his father’s character. While using some of the Dutch words and sentences he often used, things suddenly made much more sense. During the Dutch Brainwash, he frequently visited many members of his Dutch family who lived close to Amsterdam, and they were all very excited and helpful to him on this great new journey.
Other students started their first Dutch conversations with their parents, een, opa or oma. This experience is always special. Having a conversation in Dutch is somehow different.
Here is a last tip. If you like speaking Dutch because it is part of your family, make sure you do not stay in your own country. Make sure that you visit the Netherlands because then you will learn on a much deeper level. Even within 7 days, once you have that powerful focus and great positive energy, you can learn much more than you would normally do in 6 months.
Once you actually go to the Netherlands, you will be surprised by how different the Dutch world can be. You will likely discover many things about yourself because, in the end, that Dutch part of your family is also a part of you. It is always great to experience how a better understanding can lead to beautiful new things.
Albert Both
Talencoach / Dutch Flow Now
